Emily Steele

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Days of Our Lives

by Emily Steele / Wednesday, 08 January 2014 / Published in ES Confidential

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I have slacked on my resolution to write every day. It’s been 3 days since I have written a journal entry. While that is true, I promise you I have not been lax in my writing altogether. I have spent the past 2 days writing nearly 30 “thank you” cards for baby gifts from friends and family. And since I consider my “thank you” notes to be somewhat of an art form, I believe that counts.

But on to today’s topic, what the heck is happening on Days of Our Lives?? I know that soaps don’t like to leave couples, particularly super-couples, happy for too long because it’s boring. You need conflict to keep the viewers tuning in. I’m an award-winning writer. I get it. It’s why Jennifer and Daniel just can’t seem to get together and stay that way, why Sonny tried to keep Nick’s murder from Will, and why Eric is a priest. So I am not surprised the writers-that-be are throwing a wrench in Sami and EJ’s engagement. (To be honest, I’d rather see her with Lucas anyway. Hell, I’d love to see ANYONE with Lucas! Give that poor guy a storyline that doesn’t involve his mother and her blue streaked hair!) But having EJ sleep with Abigail??? Ewwwww!!!!! That was literally my response when I saw them first kiss. I “ewwwww”ed out loud. And then when they slept together, I ran to the bathroom to throw up! He is at least twice her age!! And the recently-exed girlfriend of his brother who was shot while taking a bullet meant for him! And he is twice her age!! I realize both Abigail’s love interests have left town and they need to hook her up with someone (I’d suggest Lucas but they’re uncle and niece so that would be almost as gross as her hooking up with EJ), but good lord why not just have her sleep with Victor?!

I am disappointed in you on that one, Days. I know you’re trying to create conflict for Sami and EJ but you can do better than that. And if you can’t, you need to hire me to start writing for you because I know I can do better than that! Your only redeeming grace is the hilarious lines that have been exchanged between all the people who now know about Nick’s murder. Some of my favorites being:

SAMI: We’re all losing sleep over this.

KATE: I slept just fine.

EJ: How can you be such an amateur when it comes to homicide?

GABI: Will overheard me saying I need to burn my coat.

KATE: How did he hear that?

GABI: He was hiding in the closet.

KATE: I am going to pay someone to have that closest removed from this apartment!

It really is a shame I don’t write for the show. They have no idea what they’re missing out on. I wonder if I could tell them…

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