Emily Steele

  • News
  • Actor
    • Actor Resume
    • Headshots
    • Actor Reel
    • Actor Clips And Trailers
  • Screenwriting
    • Screenwriting Reel
    • Screenwriting Sneak Peaks
    • Screenwriting Clips
  • Script Consultation
    • Sample Consults
    • Consultation Testimonials
  • Articles
    • Not That Mom
    • Can’t Argue With That
    • ES Confidential
  • Producer
  • Set Teacher
    • Set Teacher Projects
    • Set Teacher Certifications
  • Connect
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Twitter
    • IMDb
    • LinkedIn

The Doctor Is In

by Emily Steele / Friday, 04 April 2014 / Published in ES Confidential

I admit it. I have a guilty pleasure. One I take part in only in private, when I know no one else is watching. One that secretly makes me giddy, despite the fact that I never discuss it openly with friends or family. I can’t help it….I flock to it like rubberneckers at a car wreck. I love Dr. Phil!

I know, it’s a total stereotype. Stay-at-home mom watching daytime talk shows! Luckily, I’ll only be a stay-at-home mom for a few more days. And even more luckily, I now have DVR so I won’t have to worry about missing any episodes!

I can’t help it. The man just tells it like it is. He says all the things to people that I wish I could say (especially to the parents of my students!) Oh I know what all the naysayers say. “He’s not a real doctor.” Yeah well neither is Dr. Who but no one seems to be questioning his authority on anything! Listen, Dr. Phil may not be able to prescribe medication to his guests, but the heavy doses of reality he dishes out are just what the doctor ordered!

Here are just a few of my favorite Dr. Philisms:

Saying: “How’s that working out for you?”

Meaning: “Stop doing what you’re doing. Even a blind man can see you’re an idiot!”

Saying: “This ain’t my first rodeo.”

Meaning: “Cut the sh!t! Nobody’s buying it!”

Saying: “You can be right or you can be happy.”

Meaning: “Shut the f%$@ up. Justifying your behavior isn’t fixing the problem.”

Saying: “Never miss an opportunity to shut up.”

Meaning: “Shut the f%$@ up!”

Saying: “If someone out there doesn’t agree with me, then somewhere a village is missing its idiot.”

Meaning: “I’m right. You’re stupid. Deal with it!”

Saying: “You can’t play the game of life with sweaty palms.”

Meaning: “Quit being a p*$@y!”

Saying: “Opinions are like asses….everyone’s got one.”

Meaning: “You’re an ass!”

Saying: “Those who have nothing to hide hide nothing.”

Meaning: “You’re a lying sh%#head!”

Saying: “Do you think I just fell off the turnip truck?”

Meaning: “Not everyone is as big a dumb ass as you are.”

Saying: “No matter how flat you make a pancake, it always has two sides.”

Meaning: “Let’s go to IHOP!”

Looks like I just outed myself! I’ve been a closet Dr. Phil follower for years and now it’s time to come clean. Because as the good doctor always says, “you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge.” So now that I’ve admitted my sin, change can commence. Phew! It’s like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Finally! I can start watching the show AND commenting on Twitter! #Dr.Phil!!!

Share this:

  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window)

Like this:

Like Loading...

Related

Share Your Thoughts Cancel reply

ES Confidential

ES Confidential

Who Is Emily Steele?

About Emily Steele

Learn more about me and my story here!

Shop Amazon

Top Posts

  • What “All Lives Matter” Means... And Why I Don't Say It Anymore
    What “All Lives Matter” Means... And Why I Don't Say It Anymore
  • Mad About You
    Mad About You
  • Traveling With Toddlers
    Traveling With Toddlers
  • Losing Her First Tooth (And My Sanity)
    Losing Her First Tooth (And My Sanity)
  • It's A Gift
    It's A Gift

Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are “affiliate links.” This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, Joint Custody Productions LLC or Emily Steele will receive an affiliate commission.

Join The Mail List!

Subscribe to the Emily Steele Mail List and get weekly news, exclusive content, and website update notifications!

Recent Comments

  • Emily Steele on Formula, Frozen Food, And Other Foul “F” Words
  • Shane Henderson on Formula, Frozen Food, And Other Foul “F” Words
  • Mel Roady on Truth Be Told, I Lie

Recent Posts

  • What All Lives Matter Means and Why I Don't Say It Anymore

    What “All Lives Matter” Means… And Why I Don’t Say It Anymore

    Sometimes we have to be willing to see the issu...
  • Mad About You

    Mad About You

    Yelling is bad. But here's what professionals d...

Latest Tweets

81 days agoThanks for 30 years of being one of the best villains of our lives #ripjohnaniston @daysofourlives
111 days agoRT @TBInvestigation: An #EndangeredChildAlert has been issued for a 16 y/o female missing out of Wilson County. Aubrea Branham has brown h…
242 days ago#endangeredchildalert https://t.co/djpsTb1x71
278 days agoRIP Naomi Judd https://t.co/Q6R1Vv2wpg. #ripnaomijudd #naomijudd
324 days agoSorry #teamamanda fans, I’m still #teamcarolyn . I think @Sir_Kurt made a big mistake letting @caroesteph go.… https://t.co/1uDn2XuM33
Follow @theemilysteele
Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy

About

  • Terms & Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • GET SOCIAL
Emily Steele

© 2023 Joint Custody Productions LLC. All Rights Reserved.

TOP
%d bloggers like this: