by / Wednesday, 29 January 2014 / Published in ES Confidential

We all have pet peeves. Things that drive us to the brink of insanity that probably don’t even phase anyone else. The sound of someone smacking their gum. People who don’t pronounce the “h” in words like “human” or “humid”. People who like to put an “x” in the word “especially”. Me? I can let all those things slide. But there is one thing in the world that makes me want to jump across a table and backhand someone in the face. I cannot STAND it when people call me “Hun”.

To be fair, I’m not exclusively hostile to just “Hun”. “Sweetie”, “Darling”, “Doll”, “Sweetheart”, and “Love” (that last one particularly creeps me out) are also ground for some serious ass-whooping fantasies on my part. If my server refers to me as “Hun” when taking my order, she’s already knocked herself down to a 15% tip. If the nurse practitioner leaves a voicemail saying “I’ve got your test results, Sweetie”, I’m finding a new doctor. If my mechanic informs me “Darlin’, your transmission needs be replaced”….well then I am probably going to let it slide seeing as how I’m going to need to do some serious flirting to get that labor bill down as much as humanly possible. But I think you see my point. If you did not give birth to me and we’re not dating, cutesy pet names need not apply.

I know I shouldn’t let it get to me. I know most people who say it aren’t trying to be condescending. They are just too dumb to know better. Then again, maybe it’s me. Maybe I have spent too many years being starved for human kindness and affection that such terms automatically make me closed off and bitter as they remind me of the love I failed to receive as a child. Nah….they are just too stupid to know better!

Photo by missapril1956 via Flickr

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